You see, the two of us have this understanding – when one wants a piece of the other we just call – a personalized booty home delivery service, and not something with the name all over the box, which tastes of rubber, more like one of those small-scale operations, anonymous and surviving on the strength of reputation alone, no background info, no birthdays or parents names or hometowns to remember – just straight to the door sex and like any good pizza, no washing up afterwards, ‘cept I do know her, ‘cos I sorta went through her bag the second night while she went for a whiz and saw she was an Aries, which is good, ‘cos we’re meant to be compatible, not that that it matters, since her and I both know what this is about, and once the booty has come, she goes, or I go, but I got her something anyway for her b-day since I was at this market and they had these cool dioramas of like famous scenes or paintings or whatever but with the main figures made from old tarnished spoons, and there was one of the last supper – I know the last supper from spoons – so I got her that, ‘cos I thought she’d think it was cool too, and she did – not that I wrapped it – I just put it on the table and when she was looking at it I said a friend had left it behind and she could have it, which makes it a better present ‘cos it’s not like she thinks I did it outta obligation and like I said we’ve got this understanding and she wouldn’t want me to ruin it, like the time I had tickets to see Vampire Weekend and she was all like how she didn’t get into bands ripping off the culture of others, but I knew she really meant she wanted to keep some distance, and why wouldn’t she when we’ve got what we need from each other without any bullshit , it’s just dial, bam and the rest of the night is free, though on one occasion I made dinner for her, not that I said it was for her, I just pretended that the meal was ready, and sometimes after we eat, we don’t even bother with the sex and just talk or watch “Battlestar Galactica” which we both like, ‘cos we can see the depth – like how it’s all political and mythic and shit – and we talk about which ones we’d like to screw and not get jealous, or we did, until whenever Boomer came on she’d be like, “There’s your girlfriend,” and she stopped saying she’d like to bone Dr. Balzar, which I was pleased about, and it was a while after that before we had sex again, which I remember ‘cos afterwards she said, “Happy Birthday,” not that she got me anything, but she smiled at me all lazy and open and that was enough – not that I said anything – and hours later, like round one, we talked about what had come before and without realizing it I told her about growing up where I did and just the lameness of high school and she told me about her shitty parents who don’t call her for her birthdaies or Christmas, which is probably why she wished me for mine, though I hadn’t mentioned it, lucky guess, I guess, but it was nice, and usually I have no plans, I mean I go out with my best mate Trev, but then Trev got into this relationship and it’s not the same, I mean I could see him, but I know his hearts not in it, so it’s better just to hang out at my place and if she wants to come over why not? – what have I got to be ashamed of? – it’s not like we’re making some compromise like Trev, no ‘cos we’ve got this arrangement, piping hot sex to the door, and some other nights we get Thai, in fact we’ve been getting Thai a lot lately ‘cos she knows this good place and they deliver and it saves us the hassle of going out, I mean we do – sometimes – but why bother, when we’ll be together, and it’s not cool to pick up someone else when the other is around, though once we were at this cocktail bar and were like scoping the place out a bit but it was like we were someone else’s favourite series and they’d just hit mute and skipped over the sex, and going alone is pointless when I can drink wine at home and call her, though I don’t need to ‘cos she comes over a lot, or I’m there, which makes sense when you think about it ‘cos we would just call anyway and it doesn’t matter if she sleeps over or I do ‘cos we know we’ve got our place to go back to, but it’s nice from time to time to get fresh rolls for breakfast and make coffee in the coffee pot, knowing that she could just walk away and knowing I could let go is the closest I’ve ever been to someone.

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